Accidental time off

I took 2 weeks off from the gym. Lots of reasons. One was my husband was traveling for most of the week and that week turned out to be a week from hell.

The other was spring break but that is not a big excuse either.

My grandmother passed away while my husband was traveling.

It was complicated and I had no idea the emotional outbursts I would have until AFTER they would happen. I was yelling at anyone in my view, even a kid who I thought stole a dollar from my son (not my finest moment). I knew she was sick and I was prepared for the day that she would go but are you ever REALLY prepared? I thought that meant that if I was prepared, I would not cry. I would be relieved she wasn't suffering any more.

She had advanced Alzheimer's.

Junior High NHS ceremony. I look awkward, She looks so pulled together

Instead, I found myself crying in the middle of the night when I heard the news. I cried more than I thought I would. I wanted to be strong and hold it together but a lifetime of memories filled my heart and there was nothing I could do. 

She died on a Friday. Thursday afternoon, as I did my weekly hustle to get my kids to all their commitments, I prayed for her to be at peace. I assured God all was forgiven, and it was time for her to go home. 

I proceeded to eat my feelings! I ate CHOCOLATE. I don't even really like chocolate that much. But there I was, stuffing my face with chocolate marshmallow candy and chocolate covered Hostess donuts. HA! I told my mom to throw them away and instead, my dad "hid" them in their pantry. I found them easily and ate 3 more. :\

Needless to say, I need to get back at it at the gym. Enough rest. Time to go hard.

Praying for your soul grandma. Always!