Monday, June 1, 2015

I Miss My Kids

My kids are with my mom and dad this week. They get out of school a week earlier than most and the camps we have them registered for don't start until next week. My dad is retired so he will be home with them all week. My mom took Thursday and Friday off so they will be in San Antonio for those two days. They are going to have so much fun.

They have FaceTimed me every night so far. It's weird. The older they get, the more I miss them when they are away from me. I thought it would be backwards. Alexis went away for three days to Camp Kappe for school. I was a mess. I missed her so much. If I could bottle up this time and their age right now, I would. I want them to stay 11 and 8 forever! They are so much fun. J constantly cracks us up and Alexis amazes us every day.

They FaceTimed last night. Luckily, we had finished Game of Thrones. If you know me, you know I am obsessed with this show. I feel it is my civic duty to tell everyone who reads this to follow the #demthrones hashtag on twitter for amazing little gems like this.
If you don't know what this means, please look it up now!
I typically have to watch the episode twice because I am reading the timeline on this hashtag the whole time I am watching the show. Last night, we were ten minutes behind so I had to exit the app because I was trying to figure out what was coming up.

Again, I digress...

They didn't want to hang up. How sweet! I love my babies! I will carry J until I physically hurt myself. I desperately want my children to be independent and have a mind of their own, but I need to somehow do this in a way where they do not move too far from me in the future. HA! There is a fine line there and I need to figure it out. I remember when Alexis was a baby and I was going crazy. I was trying to get her to say her ABC''s. One day, TA picked her up from the sitter and he said, "Listen! She is singing the ABC song!" I could hear her in the back and I started to cry. That was something I was trying to do but I didn't get her to do it. Sandra, her sitter, did it. I called my friend Teresa, hysterical that Sandra was teaching her stuff and I was missing it. Teresa calmed me down and said to me, "It is Alexis's life. You have to let go. She is going to do things on her terms and when she is ready." I think about this all the time when they hit milestones or when they do things differently than I would have. I am here to guide her but, it is their life. They live a great life. They are the most amazing things in this world to me. I don't know how these two amazing kids came from me, but they are so unique and wonderful.  I still want to be a big part to them forever so I need to work on this independent/dependent thing. HAHAHA!
Help me! How do I do this? I need answers!!!

I thought this week would be a great week to spend every night with TA but he just sent me a message stating he is busy almost every night this week. Now his weekend is full too! So much for that! I do enjoy my alone time but I want to make sure the marriage is first on the list all the time. As amazing as my kids are, TA is still #1. I have to make sure we remember that always. We have had a motto from day one...Us against the world. It is the mission statement of our relationship. We have now included this kids in this saying but it all starts from the two of us.

But I still miss my kids. :)



(As I type this, I see Bruce Jenner is now Caitlyn. WOW! Her cover picture looks amazing!)




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