Tuesday, April 28, 2015

More change

I am getting a new boss. This is the forth time I say this in two years. My boss is getting promoted. YAY for him. It is bitter sweet for me. While I like the idea of having a supporter so high up the chain, I am sad that the supporter won't be my direct supervisor. Probably pretty selfish of me to think that. I am sure that I will gain another supporter in my new boss. It seems like the organization is bringing people in from the outside and merging them with the best of what we had and making the team look a lot better. At least that is how it looks from my perspective. There is lots of opportunity now during my industry downturn to change things and make it look "better". I say better because that is in the eyes of the new leaders. I wasn't ready for this change but I saw it coming miles away.  Lots of change.

I am also kicking myself for not standing up for what I think in a meeting yesterday. Of all the sales directors, I am the least experienced. I think that is why I clammed up. We were all stating opinions. I should have stressed mine bigger and now I am sick because I didn't. UGH! I can't do this any more. I need to open my mouth with my well thought out ideas and opinions. I will never learn or grow if I don't.

I am actually rooting for the Rockets. My normal NBA team is the Spurs. I still root for them too. It is kind of nice for the whole family to root for the same sports team. It is unusual. Won't happen again. Football season is house divided almost every weekend. Tonight is game 5 of the Rockets v Mavs.  We are missing all our free throws. Another thing that is irritating me is people want to change the rules for fouls away from the basket. NO! These are professionals. They need to practice their free throws MORE than dunks. Period. (I can hear my son downstairs watching the game. Jones just hit a clutch 3. My son is yelling "Yes! Spank their booty!" What?)

I am trying to get back to better eating habits. I have been eating like a teenager lately and it needs to stop. I can feel my body rejecting all of this and I just flat out don't feel good. I felt much better when I was eating better. Enough is enough. No more excuses. For example, I am DYING for a Dr Pepper right now. I shall drink this water instead.

I got a MacBook Air this weekend! Good change! This is my first post from my new laptop. I love it. I may never use my iPad again.

Something else is going on inside and I can't figure out what it is. I have not been my super cheerful self lately. People are starting to notice it and I can't put my finger on what it is. I wish I could so I could correct it. I think it is a lot of things. I hope I have an answer soon. It comes and goes. Monday night before I taught my class, one of the members asked me what was wrong. I wanted to tell her but I didn't even know! I always know. Even when it is selfish and ugly, I know what is bugging me. Right now, I don't know. Maybe it is the slow and steady climb of changes that have happened in 2015. I wish I knew. I am on a quest to find out. Wish me luck!

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