Themes

I know I said I wanted to use this blog as a way to vent. Now I have shifted my focus. There are several things I want to do with this blog.

Challenges as a working mother

I was washing the dishes today when I realized it had been a while since I used a colander. That got me to thinking...when was the last time I cooked a meal for the whole family? It has been a while. I think that when school winds down, I will be able to do this at least twice a week. Right now, we typically don’t get home before 7:30 pm. It is just our lives. The kids are very active after school and I teach 2 nights a week. Next week, my daughter is performing but I have a leadership meeting at work that conflicts. I know I can get out of attending the meeting, but I also want to be at this meeting. I know I will go to the school but I want to be present to my company as a leader, which brings me to my next thought...

Leadership

I have mentioned YODA a couple of times here. I want to be Yoda to my readers. I want to inspire others as well as have them learn from my experiences. I recently attended a leadership seminar where the speaker talked about “claim and grant”. I tried this during my yearly review with my boss. I told him I wanted to take on managing a large section of the business. I told him why I was the right person to do it. He nodded and said it sounded like I had thought about it and he was willing to do it. I didn’t think about this all on my own. I have been in many interviews and yearly reviews where I talked about the past and tried to explain why I was worthy. I don’t do this any more. I talk about vision, strategy and the future in these meetings now. This is a small example of what I want to pass on to anyone who decides to read this blog.

Sharing my life for real

I love my family. I love the life we continue to build together and I am so proud of them. But I want to share the “realness” of what it means to get to the top of the mountain. There are so many irritations, tough times, and sadness that have gotten us here. I am done with platitudes. I want to be real with everyone I meet and share my reasons. You might laugh, but the Bruce Jenner interview that I watched last night gave me that idea. I have lived long enough to stop hiding and start working on the person I want to be. I can’t do that without being real. I have many faults. I embrace them because they make me who I am, but I won’t let them rule my life or define me. I will find ways to overcome them or things to do for myself when I feel them coming on strong. I would like to share those struggles. 

GEAR

I often get asked where I get my clothes or how I put them together. I am happy to share my thoughts on this with my readers. I still think of myself and a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl, but no one  I work with would EVER think that. I try to look “the part” every day and before I walk out of my room, I ask, “is this the best version of me that I want to present today?” Sometimes that sends me back to the closet! HA! I am all about looking like a leader, no matter if it is in the office or at the gym.

Thoughts? Suggestions? Ideas?

Joaquin’s First Communion

Here are some photos of our fantastic day... the day Joaquin received his first communion.

Funny stories of how we got his outfit to come. For now, here are some of my faves.

Right before mass

J and my aunt Rachel, his Godmother

Lex got to alter serve that day

Anna Clair Gaal and Trent Joaquin Andrews - our dear friends’ youngest daughter

J and his Godfather Travis, TA’s brother

Notice his face after tasting the wine. :)

After mass with Fr Victor. Lex and I wore blue, J’s fave color.

Our friends The Gaals and their two youngest girls

Happy Easter and other thoughts

We went to Alice, TX for Easter. The weather did not cooperate but we had a great time...until J got sick. Saturday night was not good for him. He had a high fever and threw up a couple of time. Poor baby! He just laid around and watch the Bugs Bunny marathon on TV. He loved it! He watched old school Bugs and laughed his head off. Those cartoons are timeless. Not like the ones on TV now. A few times he asked me to watch with him. I happily obliged. That stuff is hilarious.

He felt better Sunday and went with us to church that morning. During the homily, the priest asked that we reach out to those that could not be with us that day and wish them a happy day. I really enjoy this priest. He is so charismatic and authentic. He is a true leader. He's a YODA. You can tell because the service was packed. A few years ago, that church was empty on Easter and Christmas. When I look at leaders, I try to see if they have the "yoda factor". Do they have the quality, when they speak, that inspires you to get up and do something? We don't need another Luke. We need more Yodas. (If you don't understand these references, you are dead to me.) I have three key words that come to mind when I think of my leadership style: Passionate, Courageous, Authentic. I interchange the word courageous sometimes with inspiring. I try to be a yoda both at home and at work. I have a young female leader at home. I am doing my best to guide and inspire her to develop those inherent leadership skills. She really is a leader and already very charismatic. She is held back a little in being who she really is (the price of attending a small school) but I try to re-enforce her uniqueness and all the beauty in who she really is at home. She is going to be a great leader at whatever she chooses to do.

I am a day late but I would like to wish all those who read this a Happy and Joyful Easter! Whatever your beliefs, this is a great time to celebrate life and celebrate your family.

And also...GO BLUE DEVILS!

Ash Wednesday

Went to Mardi Gras this weekend. I was ill prepared for the weather so now I am sick. Fever and cold. But I dragged myself out of bed to go to mass and get my ashes for the start of Lent.

On the drive there I was still wondering what I was going to sacrifice for Lent this time. Typically I attend Stations of the Cross but my Friday schedule will probably make that tough. I wondered what I could do. My main idea was taking a few steps closer to God. What can I do to accomplish this?

The first thing that came to mind was my blessings. I forget OFTEN of the many blessings in my life. Did I have it easy growing up? No. Did stuff happen to me that was out of my control? Yes. But now I am in control and I am making this life for me and my family. I think about that all the time as a working mom. Part of me feels like I need to be there more for my children. A bigger part of me KNOWS I need to demonstrate to them the value of hard work and seeing their mom succeed. They need to see me reaching for high goals so they can one day reach for the same. That was the role model I had growing up in my mother.

I digress..

Getting closer to God. Not that hard to do. Thank God for my many blessings and the chances I have now through his grace and love. I do always want to excel at everything I do. That is why one day this blog will be THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME. HAHA! Rarely do I stop and look around at what I have and have accomplished. I am always striving for more! Reaching for higher ground. That’s OK, but there is a piece to that puzzle I hate to admit that I have. That unsatisfying feeling I have when I realize the goal I accomplished wasn’t the highest I could go. I can go farther! I always say I hate losing more than I love wining, so this ties in to that. I am happy. I could not be more happy. I just want the constant feeling of having to overachieve to go away. I can’t be the best at everything. I certainly have tried. People tell me I make stuff look easy. As they are telling me this, they have no idea how many times that day I have beat myself up for not doing better. It happens daily. I think sometimes it is my ultra competitive nature that kicks in but I am not sure if that is really it. I feel like it hampers some of my relationships outside of my family. I don’t want that. That is the LAST thing I want. I need my friends and my support groups.

My goal is to let that go. Giving thanks for my many blessings and praying for God’s grace daily I hope helps me accomplish the ultimate goal of strengthening my faith. I don’t know if it will work. I will give it my best shot. I doubt I will ever get rid of the ultra competitive part of me but I have to try to take it down a notch. I will always want to succeed. I just can’t let it dominate my thoughts like it does now. I will always strive to be better. I just want some inner peace while I am at it.