Monday, March 30, 2015


My company is going through some changes. These are good, I think. But some people are not reacting well. I have to admit, I am very nervous. I want to help lead this change but I have so many questions. There are some very valuable people that are getting caught in the crossfire or putting themselves in the crossfire. It's strange. While I want to be supportive and move forward, I hate that these changes will lead to some big losses. I am sure most companies go through this and I try not to get too personal but it does affect me. I am passionate about my career and the things I care about. I don't want to lose any good people because I want to DOMITATE. I have only been at this company for four years but I want to win and I want to do what I have to do to win. I think about it a lot. These are the moments when I am silent. You can tell I am thinking or something is up when I am quiet.

Schedule changed at my gym. I didn't agree with it but I will roll with it if it is what the team thinks is best. My Tuesday class at work is going away. I actually gave that one up. If I want to focus on my career, I have to start giving up some things. One of them might be my classes at work. That's ok. I don't have to be in charge of everything! I have to let some little things go so that I can focus on the other areas of my life. I will miss it but I still have Thursdays.

My kids. They are growing fast. It is never more evident than when my parents are in town. My daughter is now taller than my mom and my son is not far away. She was in a play this weekend. She looked so grown up and like a star on the little stage. It was surreal. I didn't get to watch the whole thing because I was manning the concession stand. :) My son is something else. He is finally maturing..slowly...but it is happening.

All this change has my head spinning. It is time to get myself organized and focused. When I feel like I am in a cloud, I know this is what I need to do. It is scary...sort of. I need to widen my line of sight and listen. LISTEN. I am constantly learning from everyone around me. It is like the more I learn, the dumber I feel. HAHA! I can't let that hold me down. It hits me for a second but then I am back. Lots of changes. Lots of challenges. Time for leaders to step up and I am a leader. As a leader, I need to get back in the game and get out of this cloud. This cloud will kill me.

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